I cannot imagine how someone could even begin to keep track of my life. I keep moving here and there and everywhere. Now what? After all my sojourning, it looks like I’ll be moving back to Oregon.
I don’t understand why I’m hanging on to Colorado so bad. I have 18-year roots in Oregon, and pulling them up was as easy as can be. And now, I can’t even fathom pulling up 8-month roots.
But it’s over. Unless a job unexpectedly falls in my lap this week, I’ll leave in nine days.
If I get sick in Oregon I don’t have the slightest idea what I will do.
A wedding dress was falling apart at the seams and had a broken zipper. It was too big for me. For a long time it just sat in my cupboard and I wasn’t sure what I was going to do with it. But the other night I ripped it up.
I felt like Cinderella’s evil stepsisters. I just ripped. Then I took a needle and thread and began sewing lace and fluff back on in random haphazard patterns.
The reason I told you that is because it is so hard to try and explain my feelings right now. So I thought maybe if you can imagine the feelings that would cause someone to rip up a wedding dress you can imagine my feelings. But maybe that isn’t exactly true, cause I’m not divorced and my fiance didn’t dump me at the alter or anything.
I always think I would like to have a complicated life instead of a boring life and then when it gets complicated it is complicated in all the wrong ways.