Tag Archives: dreams

10 Quirky Things I Do that Make Me Feel Cool


I’ve noticed, throughout my short life, that most people think they are weird.

Often, people will say things like, “I am obsessed with olives.” Then they’ll say, “I know, I’m weird.” But you can tell that they’re not putting themselves down, they think that this quirk makes them unique and interesting.

For a long time I put many random things about myself on my blog. Things like, “I love to clean out hairbrushes.” Every time I did I thought, “someone is going to read this and think I’m so unique and interesting.”

Well today I thought of something quirky that I do, and how it makes me feel cool. I thought, “I haven’t posted for a while. Why don’t I post a list of random things I do that make me feel cool, even if they aren’t really that cool at all?”

1. I Read

I guess reading isn’t quirky, but I like to take it up a notch and read while standing in line or stuck in traffic. Then it looks like, not only am I smart and well-read, but I ALSO manage time well. No one needs to know that I go home and waste time reading about celebrities on the internet.

2. I drink tea

Obviously, tea is the drink of the refined and the artsy. I used to go so far as to bring pretty teacups saucers and teapots into class with me which made me feel SO cool, but eventually I got lazy and started using mugs.

Random fact: I once decided to do a blog post on why tea is better then coffee, but I obviously never did.

3. I watch VHS tapes instead of DVD’s or movies downloaded from the internet.

I’m not sure why this makes me feel so cool. Maybe because of all the money I save. Maybe because I can quote old classics like “Singin’ in the Rain” and “Breakfast at Tiffany’s,” while my friends can only quote “27 Dresses” and “The Hunger Games.” Maybe because I’ve boughten into the notion that retro is automatically cool.

Another random fact: I also once decided to do a post on why VHS tapes are better than DVD’s.

4. I drive slow.

Think of it this way. Most people have to wait until they’re elderly to discover how much more fun (and safe) it is to drive slower than faster. I got to join the club at a young age.

Or…maybe I had a driver’s ed teacher that told me I was a terrible driver and now, even five years later, I’m still paranoid.

But still, if there’s no one on the road and I don’t have to be anywhere fast, I slow down to 30 mph and roll down the windows and blast the radio and for some reason I feel like that is the epitome of cool.

Oh yeah, that reminds me…

5. I listen to the radio

I don’t like to spend money on music and I like the surprise of not knowing what will come on next and I like listening to people that talk on the radio and say random things like “men eat more potato chips than women do.”

I once read this book called How To Say Goodbye In Robot, and the two main characters were obsessed with listening to the radio. They were really cool, and so now that I listen to the radio I feel like I’m as cool as they are, only not quite, because the radio stations I listen to aren’t quite as cool as theirs were.

6. I am not glued to my cell phone.

If I’m in a group of people and they’re all getting on their phones, I start feeling holier-then-thou. Like, “I can have a meaningful conversation without being glued to some impersonal device.” But then when I get home and dig my phone out from under a pile of clothes and books I have no texts, though I’ll probably have a voicemail from someone saying “how come you never have your phone on you???”

7. I write letters to people longhand.

8. I dream every night and remember them if I try.

One year I wrote down 365 dreams. If I had two dreams in one night I couldn’t count them as separate dreams unless I woke up between them.

9. Sometimes I use the home phone to call my cell phone and then I put one phone up to each ear and I talk and my voice echoes back to me multiple times and for some reason I think that is so much fun.

10. I like fairy tales.

I mean, I really love fairy tales.

I have seven books of fairy tales, and eleven books that have some fairy tales and some folklore, and a book of Arabian folklore, and a book of African American folklore, which adds up to twenty books.

That is not counting the novels that are re-tellings of fairy tales.

The Famous Nobodies: Esta Miller

Hello folks. Today we have the last installment of The Famous Nobodies. I have no idea why it took me so long to post this. Maybe because I was too busy watching youtube videos about bacon.

Past episodes of The Famous Nobodies:

Sir Shawn Barry Graber IV, Junior, Esquire

Verlyn Clark Glenn

Today we are interviewing the one, the only, Esta Miller! Lets begin.

Emily Smucker: What is your full name?

Esta Faye Miller: Esta Faye Miller. I love my name.

ES: How many years have you roamed the earth?

EFM: 22, or 23 if you count when Mom roamed the earth with me inside her.

ES: What was a recent awkward moment you found yourself in?

EFM: Oh my. So many. But all to scandalous for the public readership. Remember, I work at a public health clinic. *The rest of this paragraph has been removed due to its mature content*

ES: Who do you Facebook stalk and secretly wish you could meet?

EFM: Hm, I don’t spend much time stalking people on Facebook.

Fur real? What is happening to the youth of America? I have asked this question in all three interviews and have not gotten one scandalous answer. Perhaps I should write a blog post about all the people I Facebook stalk and secretly wish I could meet.

Just a random picture to remind you all of why you should be stalking Esta on Facebook.

ES: What was the most interesting dream you ever had?

EFM: Oh my. There was the one I had when I was 8 in which I dreamed I burned the house down with a tea bag. Or the one when I got drunk in Ireland and did bad things and my friend Deron had to come over from the States and rescue my reputation, wearing his straw cowboy hat. Or the one where I kissed my (then) ex-boyfriend and he got so furious because we were supposed to be respectable Mennonites and follow “I kissed Dating Goodbye.”

Esta and her (then) ex-boyfriend who she kissed in the dream. Her (then) ex-boyfriend is now her (now) (again) boyfriend. Just a random tip for interviewers– the times are constantly changing. Be sure to post interviews as soon as you get them, instead of watching bacon videos, because celebrities are always breaking up and getting back together.

ES: Do you own a purple shirt with Justin Bieber’s face on it?

EFM: I do. It is glittery and very tight and has Justin B’s face surrounded by a heart.

I see where this is going…

ES: If I gave you an elephant where would you hide it?

EFM: I wouldn’t. I would take it back to Africa and let it go free, cause people would make a documentary about me and maybe give me the nobel peace prize.

ES: All those fraud cases against your brother, are they true?

EFM: Probably. Right now he is hiking through Mexico to Belize, so they must be. But the one about him lip locking with Janessa Tice in the EBI library is totally false. ( You are welcome, Jon)

ES: Do you have any good fashion/style tips for my readers?

EFM: If you find something you like, but can’t wear for conscience sake, and it is under $5, buy it for your honeymoon (my mom taught me that one). Also, burn anything trendy in your closet.

ES: What was your lucky break?

EFM: Honestly? That Jesus didn’t let me get away with pretending I didn’t have any problems. I’m so much happier now that I admit I have lots.

Also, that my profs never caught on how little I really knew.

ES: What keeps you awake at night?

EFM: Emergency medical calls.  Parties.  Guarding at the jail. Eating too much mac and cheese. Worries about being a bad kisser.

A picture of Esta eating. Just because. Is that bacon in the sandwich?

ES: What was a long-ago awkward moment you found yourself in?

EFM: When my slip fell off in a crowded subway station and got caught up in my trendy heels and I stood for some time trying to untangle it while a bunch of people laughed at me.

ES: What kind of people do you dislike?

EFM: People who think they have all the answers. People who are prejudice and ignorant. People who chase trends and popularity and totally miss life. People who like Nickelback.

ES: If you had to have on inanimate object attached to your hand for a month, what would it be?

EFM: My tea mug. For sure.

Looks like you have that object attached to both hands, my dear.

ES: Give a good closing-worthy piece of advice.

EFM: Don’t run away from brokenness–whether it in others, yourself, or the world. You will miss lots of stories, joy, and awkward moments.

And eat lots of garlic while you are single.

That concludes my interview with Esta Miller, and my three-part series called “The Famous Nobodies.” Coming soon:

People I Facebook Stalk and Secretly Wish I could Meet (Maybe)

Guest Post: Life in Thailand (By my crazy-awesome sister Jenny)

My Secret Hopes and Dreams

Last night, as I was drifting off to sleep, I said to myself, “I just want to be happy.”

Myself answered, “would you rather be happy, or have a wild ocean life?

I said, “a wild ocean life.”

Then I went to sleep.

This is a post about what I want out of life, how I came to those conclusions, and how I am pursuing those dreams.

To begin with, I will talk about babies.

What is it with woman and babies? If I spent years studying neurological science in women, or God’s ordered plan for families, or both, could I understand it?

When there was a newborn in the church,  all my friends used to gather in a line, waiting for a chance to hold it. I was, I will confess, never in that line. I didn’t really like babies. They were hot and sticky and I always ended up accidentally dropping them. If being a woman meant that I had to like babies, well phooey, I would just fail at being a woman.

I guess I just thought I would never like babies. Never want one, never need one.

However. About a year ago, my cousin Randy and his wife Shelley had a baby girl named Jocelyn. I went to visit her, and held her, and before long I was starting to have dreams that Jocelyn was my baby. Furthermore, they were very pleasent dreams.

So for what it’s worth, I now have a secret wish for a baby someday.

Of course, the subject of babies leads naturally into the subject of husbands. As odd as it sounds, the main reason I want a husband is for the convenience.

Problem: I’m sick all the time and have a hard time making enough money to support myself.

Solution: Husband!

Problem: I am going to go on the mission field, but am scared of how lonely/depressing it would be to go alone.

Solution: Husband!

Problem: I want to adopt a baby, but still firmly believe that a child should have, if possible, a mother and a father.

Solution: Husband!

If I were planning my romance, it would go like this. There would be a guy, and I would fall for him, but I wouldn’t know if he liked me or not, and no one would know that I liked him, etc, so as to have zero zilch drama.

But in the meantime I would get to know him and realize that he was perfect for me.

Then, one day, he would realize that I was perfect for him too, and he would say, “Hey Emily, let’s get married and jet off to Africa.”

“Okay,” I would say, and we would get married and jet off to Africa.

Impossible, you say? There is no such thing as a romance without drama, you say? Well. A romance without drama is one of my secret hopes and dreams, however far fetched it may be.

But bigger, much much bigger than babies or husbands, is my hope and dream to be on the mission field some day.

Maybe this one shouldn’t be in the same category. With babies and husbands, the hope is one born of natural desire that most women will experience without being able to help it. The mission field idea began with a hope of being involved in  something bigger than myself, which is a natural enough desire. However, after years of random trials and wild ocean life, I realized that the way to be involved, really involved in something bigger than myself, was to give everything to God without holding back.

God said, “I want you on my mission field.” Thus, the desire to be a part of something bigger than myself transformed into a desire to be on God’s mission field, permanently, for the rest of my life.

I have one more dream to share. My dream to finish college.

Although I felt very strongly for a while that God wanted me to get my degree in communications before I went on the mission field, I began to doubt myself this winter. My friend Phebe and my sister Amy both went on long mission trips, returning with pictures and stories of poverty and sadness and people who needed Jesus. I thought, “what am I doing her, going to college, when I could be out there, accomplishing great things for Christ?”

This doubt churned round and round in my brain, and I didn’t know what to do with it. Once I was talking about this to my cousin Randy and he said, “Emily, this is my opinion. I think there are missionaries, and then there are effective missionaries. The effective missionaries are the ones who have spent time in preparation.”

That really struck a chord with me. I had felt before that God wanted to prepare me by sending me through college, and now the same feeling returned. Because truth be told, I love college. I mostly love learning.

What are your secret hopes, dreams, and desires?