Sometimes when I write things on my blog or facebook I pretend that my grandmother and my liberal/feminist/gay friend are both looking over my shoulder.
It is easy enough to have opinions when you are only going to say those opinions to people who won’t be hurt by them.
For instance: One day I had a brilliant thought. What if all the single mothers who were going to have babies were self-sacrificial enough to give their babies up for adoption? What if they stopped being selfish, and in order to give their child a better life, gave him/her to someone who could take better care of it?
I expressed this idea to a friend of mine, who said, “I was raised by a single parent.”
Did that derail me? Yes it did. I stammered and said, “so, like, how did that go, being raised by one parent?”
“It went okay,” she said, almost confused. “I am who I am.”
It because painfully obvious to me that there was a flaw in my theory. No matter how much I want my cousin and her husband to be able to adopt a child, I can’t go around calling single parents “selfish” for keeping their OWN CHILDREN.
The point of the story is that people have different morals, different things that will offend them, different ideas of how a person should live. Because of this, it is easy to be a different version of Emily depending on who I am with.
I don’t like that.
I like being consistent.
I don’t want to be a Peter, denying Jesus as soon as being Jesus’ disciple became uncool.
If I wouldn’t be comfortable saying something in front of my Grandmother, I don’t want to say it at all.
I want to be consistent.