Quotes and Pictures

Two old men walk into the store.

Man #1: He’ll pay for my groceries.

Man #2: No I won’t!

Man #1: Look what I have to put up with! She’s so much prettier than you anyway. But I’m stuck with you.

Man #2: She is prettier than me.

(Man #2 did not pay for Man #1’s groceries. After I rung up Man #2’s groceries…)

Me: Goodbye, have a nice day!

Man #2: Goodbye babe!

The kittens: Larry, Claudio, Selene, Curly, Moe, and Jazz. 

Me: Hi, how are you today?

Man whose groceries I was ringing up: Well, one of my friends died this morning.

A sign I found on the cookies when I got home.

Jenny: I like that picture about as much as I like your sleeves.

Me: You don’t like my sleeves?

Jenny: No.

Me: But Jenny, people used to always wear sleeves like this!

Jenny: Well, I didn’t like it then either.

pause

Jenny: Actually I probably wasn’t even born then.

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