The “Generally Awesome Person” Award

I graduated tonight.

I sat beside my friend Nora. We each had a card with our name and degree on it, for the person to read off just before we were handed our diploma cover.

“I wonder if they’ll read off everything I wrote on here,” said Nora.

I looked at her paper. After her degree she had written, “News Editor at The Commuter.”

“Oh, that’s a good idea. I should do that too,” I said.

“You’re gonna write that you were a contributing writer?” she said.

When she put it that way it sounded lame. So instead I wrote, “Generally awesome person award.”

We all filed up. I handed the woman my card. She read, into her microphone, “Emily Smucker. Associate of Arts Oregon Transfer. Generally awesome person award.”

And then she laughed out loud.

I shook the college president’s hand and got my diploma cover. Then I stood to get my picture taken.

“You won the generally awesome person award?” asked the photographer.

“Yeah,” I said.

“Did you just make that up?” he asked.

“Yeah,” I said.

Then, instead of walking back to my seat, I walked out of the building. I didn’t feel so good.

The friends who had come to support me saw me leave and followed me. None of them had heard my name announced or seen me get my diploma or shake the president’s hand. They had all zoned out during the enormous amount of Associate of Applied Science degrees.

Oh well. I was glad they’d come. I missed my family.

And then there was like, cake and punch and I took pictures with people who worked at the Commuter. And I also took pictures with the roadrunner. But every picture taken of me is now on someone else’s camera.

Story of my life.

I don’t like the phrase “story of my life.” To me it sounds like, “sympathize with me, but I’m so interesting because this happens to me all the time, lol.” So I’m not sure why I just said “story of my life.”

Okay goodnight.