Sometimes God says to me, “do this.”
And then he says, “never mind. Do that.”
I’m not really sure why. But I am not, I repeat, NOT, going to Faith Builders this winter. (you know, Faith Builders, that little Mennonite college in Pennsylvania that I was going to go to, like, tomorrow….)
And yes I did make this decision the day before yesterday. I guess I am a last minute person. Or maybe I’m just a regular person who happens to do things at the last minute.
Now I must say that, not only did I decided randomly and suddenly to not go to Faith Builders, I also decided to QUIT MY JOB.
(A moment of silence, as the crowd gasps at my stupidity.)
It kind of happened accidentally. And I may very likely go back if my health improves. But the sad fact is, I am a completely unreliable grocery store clerk at the moment. I get very tired, so that my legs feel like sticks of string cheese, and my arms feel like they have no more strength than helium balloons.
Now, the big question. What am I going to do with my life until March? I mean, no job, no Faith Builders, no college this term (probably)….
I don’t know exactly, but here’s what I’d LIKE to do.
1. Volunteer EVERYWHERE
2. Finish my novel or maybe write a new one
3. Make friends with people who are my friends but are not that close of friends but will be close friends if I make time for them.
Of course you may be asking yourself how I am going to pay for college if I don’t have a job. Or how I am going to end up being a missionary if I don’t have the stamina to spend 6 hours a day checking out groceries.
Here’s the deal, though. If God says, “do college, become a missionary,” I do college and become a missionary.
If God says “never mind,” I say never mind.
It’s up to him to figure out the money and stamina aspects of these things.
The Girl in the Red Rubber Boots 
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